Friday, July 2, 2010

An Internal Reveal

So last night was a spontaneous date night for me and the hubs... I had been over to my moms house earlier and she said, "Hey, I'll watch the boys if you and Dustin want to do something." Done and done!

The original plan was to catch a movie, but we decided instead to grab dinner on a patio somewhere and just chitchat... something that we rarely do anymore. And I was determined not to let this wonderful opportunity get spoiled by something like talking about the kids or what bills needed to be paid.

We headed to the local brewery... ordered some tapas... and started in!

Earlier in the day, some of my internet friends and I played a little game in which we disclosed 5 things that everyone didn't already know about us. I mentioned it to Dustin... and he probably thought that when I said "Today on the 'Tini..." my statement was going to be a mix of rants, laughs, or boring (to him) subject matter.

But instead, I said "Why don't we try this... what don't I already know about you?"

And with those words came a mix of laughs and smiles and thoughts that neither of us had thunk before. I found out some interesting things about him that I didn't know, but more importantly, I found out stuff about me that I didn't know.

For example, I know that I need a lot going on. I know that I dabble in too many projects. I know that I am weird like that. I didn't know that the reason I do it is likely because I just really want to be good at something. Not good as in you get an A+ on your paper and mom puts it on the fridge.. I had too many of those... they lost their appeal a long time ago. More like really good as in it's "MY thing"... the thing I do. The thing I am known for. And since nothing I do is over the top awesome (yet)... I don't have a thing... and instead I'll try another thing. Until I find something that clicks for me.

I am learning more about myself and who I need to be.... nay, who I want to be! I still have a lot of time before I am all grown up... and I know that I don't have to be super great at anything.... but I plan on taking the next few years to figure out who I am and what I want to do with my life. I don't mind being a jack of all trades, but I'd much rather be totally awesome at one.

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