Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Wanna make God Laugh??

I always joke that the fastest way to make God laugh is to tell him your plans. And I don't meant that God doesn't want us to do what we want to do, quite the contrary! But I do think that sometimes we want to control every facet of life. We want to do what we want to do. End of Story.

I am no exception... I wanted to go back to work. I organized my daycare. I got the boys registered. I got the rules down, I got them excited. I squared away a job. A paycheck. I got my husband on board. I was ready for Monday.

And then God laughed.

His laughter sounded an awful lot like my son's wailing at 2am on Saturday. And it lasted all weekend. I thought Corbin had an ear infection... or maybe herpangina again. But the Urgent Care and After Hours doctors said it was nothing.... "just teething".

I hate "just teething".

But fast forward to today. Wednesday. And I am not at work. I am at home... caring for a baby with Hand Foot and Mouth disease... and an ear infection. And he can't go back to daycare until Monday... at the earliest.

I am not mad or anything... but I feel like I am being tested. Like I need to make sure this is what I am ready for. Like this is where I belong. In a month, when I am no longer a contractor, I won't have the luxury (?) or being able to call out and just say "Sorry... gotta stay home with the kids today. Call me if you need me." Is that what I want? And if it is... why am I still questioning it?

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